What My Father Taught Me

My father is a good father. He has lived his life honorably. Not every one is as lucky as I have been. I am cognizant of that fact. Today I want to honor my father by remarking on his life and what he means to me.

We lived on a farm. There were many opportunities to learn the meaning of work and how to do an acceptable job. The expectation of what Dad wanted was known to us children, and we worked hard to meet it. Everyone worked in our family. Farming life involves the whole family. No one was a slacker. Slacking off was inconceivable to us. I didn’t resent farm work, but I did enjoy the winters when there wasn’t so much to do.

Long ago my sister Lois related a story to me. A professor had just asked a provocative question. “What if you were slated to die when someone stepped in and offered to die in your place. Who would that person be?” She thought about who would be willing to die in her place, when the answer came to her. She knew that Dad would die in her place. That was saying a lot, and I’ve never forgotten it.

Something in my father changed when we lost Lois. Dad became softer, more expressive and demonstrative. Being demonstrative had not been the way of my parents. After that, Dad greeted me with a hug, and hugged me whenever I had to leave. He and Mother would stand outside and wave at me as I drove away (as they did with all their family). Dad still does this. He walks me out of his apartment and down the hall. He hugs me outside and then waits until I’m in my car. As I drive away, I wave at him and he at me. Residents and staff have remarked about it. It sets Dad apart, and it is a blessing me.

My father taught me how —

  • to ride a bicycle,
  • to drive a tractor at age 9,
  • to work hard and do well,
  • to think for myself,
  • to treat people right,
  • to tell the truth,
  • to do my best,
  • to save money,
  • to love my neighbor,
  • to honor God.
  • and to live honorably

Dad, thank you for blessing me.

Dad and Mom with their great grandson (my grandson) at Christmastime, 2010.

Life is different for Dad today.

We all interact according to what we can do.

Juanita, my sister from Idaho, calls Dad often. They talk about family and they read scripture together and talk about it. Dad reads a portion, and she reads a portion.

Marilyn, my sister from Washington, frequently calls Dad (my sisters alternate). Dad and she talk about places, people, and things in his history plus family, farming, and machinery.

Paul, my brother from near Red Bluff, almost an hour away, visits Dad weekly. He takes Dad out for a drive to places Dad enjoys. Sometimes they eat at In-N-Out, which Dad loves.

I, Norma, live a mile from Dad. I visit him a few times a week and take him to most of his appointments and take care of the daily stuff.

Of course, there are other things we graciously do for our father.

Father’s Day

Father’s Day is a day to recognize our fathers for the gifts they are and the gifts they bring/brought to our lives. My father is a blessing.

Dad will come over for a meal on Father’s Day. I will have the opportunity to bless him and say thanks.

To all fathers, may you have a blessed Father’s Day.

. . .

A few recent pictures of Dad with my family that I think you will enjoy.

A pre-pandemic visit with Son 3.
Daughter 1 and children at Dad’s place, 2019.
We’re at the sprint car races for Dad’s 90th birthday. It was sweet when the announcer said that a Ray Brumbaugh was celebrating his 90th birthday by going to the races. Dad stood up and took a bow while the fans clapped.
Dad and my brother, 2020.
Daughter 2, Son 2, and Son 1 social distancing in the courtyard (the only way we were allowed to visit Dad) while talking with Grandpa and Uncle Paul.
Dad, Paul, and me.
Dad checking out the tree’s skinned bark. Always the consummate farmer.

When I Hit the Wall & I Didn’t Fall

I hit the wall, but I didn’t fall. By God’s grace I chose to not have a bad attitude. I didn’t want to have a “poor me” attitude. I didn’t want to go down that path. But the circumstance hurt, and I still shed a few tears. Through my tears, I texted my prayer partner, “I just want to trust God, follow His lead, and keep moving forward.

Rather than falling apart when disappointments come, rather than giving way to self-pity in my despair, I want to go a different route. I want to live a life of trust in God that’s real, with a gracious, healthy response.

I desire to choose the better good. I want to trust God, follow His lead, and keep moving forward.

We can look up. Give our whatever to God. He will carry us through. Seek Him, and we will find what we seek. When dismayed, let Him help. All we have to do is ask, trust and believe. God is not slack concerning His promises. He is able, willing, and He cares. 

My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Cor. 12:9

For three years God ministered to my brokenness with the verse, “My grace is sufficient for you.” It played over and over in my mind as I slew dragons and conquered fears. God be praised, I made it. He was strong when I was weak. His grace was sufficient. How I praise Him for His grace.

Oh, Father God, how I need to follow Your way and walk faithfully in it. How I need to treat my fellow human with Your grace and love, with human kindness and human goodness. How I need to quit worrying and fretting, and to keep trusting and keep reaching higher. How I need to keep mercy flowing throughout my days, be the days easy or difficult.

This week I experienced a remarkable thing. We talk about how our bodies have muscle memory. Muscle memory comes with practice. “Extend grace to him.” Like an ingrained habit, “extend grace” played in my mind automatically when a negative thought toward a brother in the Lord had entered my mind. I hadn’t even tried to think it, but it was there when I needed it. It shaped my attitude for the rest of the day.

Although it is difficult at times to keep the right focus, we can choose to do it.

I will trust God, I will follow His lead, and I will keep moving forward.

“Praise Him, Praise Him, Jesus, our blessed Redeemer.” He’s in this with us. Praise Him for that!