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I’m Thankful for Friends

A Close Friend

I’m so thankful for friends. I’ve had some very good friends. Some friendships have been defined by trust and goodwill. I think of David and Jonathan. Theirs was a remarkable friendship especially considering Saul’s envy-turned-to-hatred of David. Jonathan was loyal in a remarkable way, doing all he could to protect his friend. Read 1 Samuel 20. That’s how it is with the best of friends.

Thank you, dear God, for the gift of good friends.

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Ronda and me during our freshman year at Western Baptist Bible College, 1973. She was bold and I was shy but we both liked being a little bit crazy. We could be found hanging out at the Manna Shoppe playing ping-pong as partners against the guys or whomever. We also went chicken-picken with the Senior class. If you want to know what that is, you’ll have to ask me. We were also known to have done Chinese Fire Drills at stop lights after having pizza at Pietro’s.

A Thankful Heart

In every stage of life I’ve had one or two close friends. These friends and I can pick up where we left off whenever I see them. Some I have lost track of like Debbie, my grade school chum. She loved horses and had her own horse and rode it over to my house. Debbie got all the latest Nancy Drew books and would share them with me. We would play checkers or hangman during rainy day recesses. Once in awhile she would go to church with me. In high school she made a profession of faith through involvement with Young Life. The friendship endured until we graduated high school. I’ve often wondered about her and how her life turned out.

Friends have special places in the heart. We can tell our stuff to them and they don’t hold it against us. We can whine and complain and they realize we’re venting. They rejoice in our successes and don’t get jealous. They come alongside when we need someone to care. When our world falls apart, they step in and make themselves available to fill in the gap. They accept us and like us. We feel safe with our best friends. A trusted friend is straight with you, even when it’s uncomfortable. Friends are good listeners.

imageThis image is from a card I was sent by my bff Ronda back in the 1970s. We really hit it off as friends our freshman year at WBBC. We were always together. She and I even had a mud fight in the irrigation ditch when she came to visit. Such good times. The words in her card to me express the appropriate sentiment. It was that kind of friendship. Later we were in each other’s weddings.

Ronda was the first to support my dream of writing a book by buying me a publishers resource manual soon after I mentioned I’d like to write children’s novels with time travel plots. She believed in me and said so.

“Thank you, Ronda” if you’re reading this.

Here’s living proof of the infamous mud fight.

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Lois, me, Ronda, and Max at my family’s farm.

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Ronda and me, kindred spirits.

What do you consider to be the best quality in a friend?

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It’s the Little Things: Key Phrases

Phrases that Pack a Punch

When a cashier says to me, ‘Thank you, Miss,’ I smile because at my age you usually hear ‘Thank you, Mam.’ The other day a white haired woman in front of me was asked, ‘Anything else, Miss?’ and I grinned. I told the young man that I liked it when he called her ‘Miss’ because it’s always nice to hear that at our age. He smiled back at me and said he likes to make people’s day. There’s something to be said for that sort of thing. I used ‘What’s wrong?’ with my daughter yesterday. It all spilled out, what was concerning her. Then she was back to normal.

Be Intentional with Your Words

It helps to have these phrases handy when you need them. People need the right words at the right time.

  • Thank you. The words ‘Thank you’ can make all the difference. A good rule of thumb is to say ‘thank you’ every time someone does something for you. . . even if it is an expectation. (I started thanking my students and it lifted the tone in the room.)
  • You’re welcome.  The words ‘You’re Welcome’ acknowledge you noticed their thank you. They represent a formal courtesy. Sometimes ‘no problem’ doesn’t cut it.
  • How can I help?  May I help you? These related phrases are a gracious way to offer assistance without being pushy or inquisitive.
  • Let’s talk.  This means, I care and am willing to take the time to listen to you.
  • What’s wrong? What’s the matter?  Said in a nice way, these questions can open the door to a much-needed conversation.
  • May I pray for you? I’ll pray for you.  People appreciate this offer of support regardless of their beliefs.
  • How are you doing?  This question opens the gate for those who are needing someone to talk to.
  • I appreciate you.  It’s always nice to hear an affirmation.
  • I’m so glad to see you.  This is a day brightener. Say this often as you look them in the eye.
  • You mean a lot to me.  Even parents need to hear these words.
  • I love you.  The best words ever.
  • What do you need?  The nice thing about this one is that it can mean physical, spiritual, emotional (or whatever) support.
  • I’m sorry.  Please forgive me.  There’s nothing quite like saying these words to someone you wronged or hearing them when you’ve been wronged.
  • I forgive you.  These words are powerful. Give them freely, for they release you from bondage to the event/person.
  • I was wrong.  Take ownership for what is your part. This is better than one hundred excuses like ‘it was a mistake.’
  • You are/were right.  This is hard to say because pride gets in the way.  Humble yourself.
  • Have a great day!  This is a nice way to say ‘I wish you well’ to people you meet.
  • You look nice!  I know this may not be PC, but I still like to hear it.
  • That was great!  After eating a meal out or that someone else cooked, going to a concert, doing something fun with others, this sentiment is a nice acknowledgement that blesses everyone who hears it. It makes everyone feel good.
It's the little things. Phrases that count.
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What would you add to this list?