An Unexpected Gift I was Given Today

Dear Readers,

What grabs your heart?

I couldn’t possibly name everything that grabs my heart. Good things and bad things pile up and make me notice them. Some are special enough to stop me in my tracks. One happened today.

I went to see my mother this afternoon. She is not well and is nearing the end of her earthly journey. Mother was sound asleep when I walked into her room. I straightened the family pictures and tidied her room a bit. I told her I was there, not wanting to startle her when I would touch her arm before holding her hand in mine.

I read Psalm 23 to her out of Mother’s own bible, the one with the hand sewn quilt-like cover she made long ago. I hoped maybe she could hear me. And then I prayed a different sort of prayer, one of blessing, love, and God being with her.

Mother was in a deep slumber, and she was resting peacefully. She looked serene and sweet. As I gazed at her face, I was struck by its softness, loveliness, more like she was in her younger years. Something about her, today, in a beautiful way, grabbed my heart.

I’m going to miss her when she’s gone.

I spoke with my former pastor yesterday. I mentioned my mother. He said he would pray that she would know peace during this time and be overshadowed by God’s presence. Pastor is a man of his word, and I know he prayed for her.

I think it is Pastor’s prayers that touched Mother today even though I pray for her almost every visit. Mother never awakened while I was with her this afternoon, but I felt a great tenderness as I looked at her.

Seeing Mother like that–with a gentle beauty, relaxed and at peace–was like a gift to my soul. Too often I get caught up in the worry, distress, and turmoil that comes with multiple E-R visits, rehab stays, and worrisome decline, but they are not the real story.

The real story is who she is.

My mother is a beautiful person and my soul knows it well.

 

Kindness is a Virtue

Kind hearts are the gardens,

Kind thoughts are the roots,

Kind words are the flowers,

Kind deeds are the fruits.

Take care of your garden,

And keep out the weeds,

Fill it with sunshine,

Kind words and kind deeds.      –Henry W. Longfellow

 

I reckon there are three things in life that are important.

The first is to be kind.

The second is to be kind.

The third is to be kind.     –Leanin’ Tree magnet

 

Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.” Matthew 5:8 ESV

Teach Them to be Kind

“It takes so little to be kind,” said my sister Marilyn to me in a conversation. Kindness is a choice. Kind is a way of being. You ‘be’ kind like you ‘are’ love to others. Kindness is a virtue. Kindness also has a spiritual side. You will find it listed with words like integrity, love, goodness, good-will, and tender-hearted. I discovered the Longfellow poem in 1979 in a first grade beginning reader. I made a flowery bulletin board with the poem. Its words ring true. Kind hearts are the gardens, and kind thoughts are the roots.

We could change the world if everyone would put a kindness factor in place, if everyone decided to be kind to others regardless of the circumstances. Kindness is a respectful attitude that takes the time to be patient with others even when they irritate us or may not deserve it. It is cultivated in our spirit. Kindness is like a gift to the soul.

Every mother, grandmother, father, grandfather, teacher, coach, and just about anybody can act with kindness. Here’s one of my teacher stories. I’ve shared it before, but it fits with this subject. I learned a lot about loving my students that year. We did it via shared community.

The class that year was a combination 2nd/3rd split. The school hired me one month in which meant I was given the children with greater educational needs. The students as a whole were a mix of underachievers and misbehavers with others too shy to respond at all, one with selective mutism–she never said one word in class the whole year. (I saw her brother recently, and he said she’s a teacher now! Go figure.).

I was determined to bring my students up to speed. Their struggles challenged my best efforts. Classroom dynamics were such that it made it difficult to meet my educational objectives.

With great intention, I instituted several extras to help us bond as a group and grow as unit. The hyperactive student learned to self-monitor his behavior and without a word from me would move to a special desk whenever he was distracted or caused distraction. He became efficient at this without me intervening, and he liked its calming effects. He’d look over at me and smile and then take his paperwork over to the desk by my desk.

I instituted Acts of Kindness for throughout the week to be read by me on Fridays. Acts of kindness were written on slips of paper and put in a slotted box. Submissions were anonymous. They loved this and they kept the playground litter cleaned up.

I wanted every student in my class to feel good about themselves and appreciated. Some kids had drama going on at home and needed a safe place. To accomplish this, we would have to know each other better. Every morning after the flag salute, a student in our class was front and center. They were given an opportunity to talk without interruption about their interests. The children were guided through prompts from me. The silent child would nod or shake her head and smile in response to my questions. One boy shared art he had created. As a former home-schooler, he was adjusting to public school.

For Valentine’s Day I wanted my students to show appreciation for the adults who served them. Our class made thank you cards for every support staff member: Crossing guard, the cook and cafeteria workers, yard duty personnel, office workers, maintenance personnel, bus driver, and computer lab technician. I demonstrated proper etiquette. Student with student, they practiced introductions. Then we as a group delivered the cards. The children introduced themselves to the recipient, looked them in the eye, shook their hand, and then read the card out loud.

By the year’s end we as a group had grown into a community of caring individuals. We even did a chant-like performance for the retiring district superintendent. The students shined! Toward the end of the year, the most out-going child was encouraging the most reserved child. It was a delight to watch. The classroom energy blossomed into a positive atmosphere. Everyone was blessed, including me.

Kindness works that way. Kindness is universal, has no political party, encourages positive social interactions, and is other-centered. Being kind begins in the heart, is activated by the mind, is cultivated by the Spirit, and is instituted by the action. A pure heart will extend grace to others because it wants to and knows it is the right thing to do.