LET’S START SOMETHING

LET’S BECOME OTHER-FOCUSED…

On August 18, 1988, George H.W. Bush said, “But where is it written, that we must act as if we do not care, as if we are not moved? Well, I am moved. I want a kinder, gentler nation.” People took notice. A kinder, gentler nation were words to heed and they inspired hope. We welcomed them like a breath of fresh air. Might this be an apt time to re-engage the public conversation with a similar sentiment? The upcoming election cycle might be a perfect time to return to the basics.

Do we need a kinder, gentler nation?

The answer unequivocally is, yes we do.

Many believe we as a people have strayed too far from any common ground that could or would unite us; that we are living in a cultural civil war–a war of words, values, and beliefs; that we are so completely divided that whatever hope we once had has gone by the way of the dinosaur and is now an illusion, a dream that will never ever come true. That would seem to be a given and the general consensus.

But for one idea that governs them all.

There is always hope.

Hope speaks life. It says we have the means to change our ends. Hope starts with the individual. Change happens one person at a time. You are that person. What you do, how you act and react, matters a great deal; just ask your children, parents, employer, employee, colleagues, church family, contacts, teammates, social group, and the people you meet.

You matter. Your life makes a difference.

You are needed.

Your self-talk influences the conversation. Self-talk provides the lens through which you view your thoughts and actions. You have a part to play. Some people impact the lives of others more than you ever may, but everything you think, act, or do impacts your life in some particular way. Your thoughts are a constant presence in dictating how you live this moment in time.

Your mind constantly sorts, grasps, deletes, and makes plans. Rather than submit to hopeless or helpless feelings and any self-focused or narrow-minded limiting factors, you can do better. All of us can do better. Your influence, visibility, passion, and vision make this a probable possibility that should not be dismissed nor disregarded as too late in your personal narrative or in the ongoing national and international conversation.

Yes, we can do better.

I can do better.

Lasting are the legacies of those whose lives are lived with drive and purpose. People cannot keep what they give to others. An irony is embedded in this. Whatever the person gives or doesn’t give becomes the way in which they are remembered. An overtly selfish person is remembered as self-absorbed. A person bound to their money and possessions is known for their on-going pursuit of a massive financial portfolio and all their material ‘toys.’

Less well known are those who care about their fellow human beings: People’s circumstances, living conditions, dignity and value. Those who live to give, who choose to live to bless, who find purpose and meaning in an other-focused trajectory rather than a self-focused “me” outlook, live on an entirely different plane. By living to bless anyone they meet on their daily path, these individuals discover something of importance that has lasting ramifications. The process has shaped them into generous people. What they give freely beyond their actions is a form of inner peace that speaks goodness to whomever it touches.

The way of love acts from its core essence of peace.

Love and peace go hand in hand.

There’s a family in Africa who feeds children that have AIDS. Here’s why. Sometimes these children with AIDS receive less food when there isn’t quite enough food for their whole family. These children are seen as less viable. This couple took an interest when they became aware of these hungry, suffering children in their community. They decided to feed them. What started small has grown. What at first was just a few children is now many children to feed. This family provides a hot meal as best they can but the couple’s personal resources are limited. A family member of mine shared with me the need for financial means to buy bulk food staples to help this couple feed the children.

Love is like that. It sees a need. It cares. Then it does something about it, at personal cost of time, money, and effort. I love this couple’s heart and their willingness to meet a need, just because they care about hungry children defined by their illness.

That tugs at my heart.

Blessed are the pure in heart.

My cousin, a farmer, visits an eldercare facility to share a few words of spiritual cheer with the residents. They love him for it. Although his mother–who used to live there–passed on a couple of years ago, “Pastor Jeff” continues his weekly visits. He cares about the people who live there. I asked him why he still goes. He says he enjoys the time he spends with those he’s come to know. His visit is an event for the residents. For him, it is a gift of presence and love.

He gets it.

People matter.

As we think in our heart so are we. Interactions with one another have the ability to bypass the areas where we part company in our set beliefs. An open mindset that centers your mental faculties and physical energies to include others you meet regardless of their beliefs, race, socioeconomic status or whatever, is an underlying principle that subconsciously guides any action. With this in mind, we take notice of people rather than ignoring them.

You can’t hate others when you care about them.

We can change it up. We can have an optimistic outlook. Our lives can make a difference.

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

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P.S. This post comes from my manuscript on other-focused living, a nonreligious writing. The manuscript lacks a title. I’m open to any suggestions.