The words of the wise are like goads, their collected sayings like firmly embedded nails–given by one Shepherd.   Ecclesiastes 12:11. NIV

We’ve all had experiences that were traumatic. Some of these have altered our lives in significant ways. Our response to the trauma is significant. We will go through a host of different emotions as we deal with it as best we can. Sometimes we may even find ourselves side-lined for a few days, months or even years as we seek to cope with our issue. It takes time, and lots of it.

I have a friend who chooses to never look back. The bad happens and he keeps on going. I happen to be on the opposite side. The bad happens and I get stuck in it. Both are ways of coping with pain but neither is life-giving to our souls. To nurture health in ourselves and in our souls we must find a way to sort through the present reality and also our troubles from our past reality. Why? That we might learn and also become aware of that which builds up and that which destroys, what is true and what is not, and so we won’t make the same mistake twice or make a wrong conclusion about something or someone and our part in it.

For example, as a divorcee’ I am more aware of the pattern of other divorced people. Some, straight out of the failed relationship, are excited about their new-found freedom. With great enthusiasm, they jump right into the dating scene and all that. For them, it is like reverting to the high school or college scene, looking good, the charm and excitement of being attractive again or finding the other person as attractive, The divorced person has a need. They are going to fill this emptiness by being close to the action. The buzz and romance is sweet to the the starved-for-affection person. But it is a danger zone. Recognition of the person’s need for healthy relationship is not being addressed and the reason behind the failed relationship is being ignored.

Wisdom is not found there. We must look at the past, the ruined relationship, failed business deal, church trouble, wrong endeavor, or failure to thrive in a specific area, and list it out. What worked and what didn’t work, our part in it and their part in it, who or what is good for me or what should I avoid if I want a healthy long-term relationship? It can be a danger zone when a person is so hungry for love or acceptance, success and pats on the back, that they seek validation and emotional support without being wise and without gains in their spiritual maturity.

Wisdom is concrete. It speaks and is anchored like firmly embedded nails. In God’s words, we find what is wise and that which is life-giving, words of wisdom given by one Shepherd. Keeping our mind centered on His will and truth is essential when we are in a crisis. Recording truth according to the Word of God is critical to understanding. When we look to God, with paper in hand, we can proceed to identify what we “need to know.” By avoiding the truth will keep us from learning and eventually causes starvation in our spiritual life. We often pity those whom never move forward, and we all know them. People get stuck in an open wound caused by a loss which overwhelms their present and inhibits their future. We, too, suffer from this condition more than we realize. It need not be this way.

Yesterday I spent a couple of hours at Billie Park in Paradise, California. I was there to mark some time while waiting for my daughter. I walked, prayed, and visited with others. I took my notebook to a shaded area near a stream and sat on a bench. I found myself listening to the bubbling creek and cheerful birds’ songs. I entered the topic at the top of the notepad page. Next I labeled the sheet into two columns “+” and “-″.  I was ready to dive in and document what I feel went wrong or right from an outward, non-emotional perspective. It was about a past church crisis that has affected me and others in my faith community.  Me, like others, have been confused as to how to view what happened and then how to make sense of it. I prayed the following words before writing the list:

Speak to my heart, dear God. Show me what goes on this list. Help me to see it more clearly. What would you like to tell me today?

The plus and minus columns began filling up. I wrote what I already knew to be true. Then more statements were added to each side of the list as God helped me understand what I could not readily see in my human, limited knowledge. I continued to sort my thoughts for a substantial period of time. I did not rush it, and I was praying to God or praising Him much of the time. It was a beneficial, spiritual, and practical exercise in helping me understand with discernment and clarity some of the problems and issues, and also the way choices have impacted the present.

Looking to God, taking His known Truth by centering oneself in the presence of God, is of great merit and benefit. Human wisdom is short-sighted, but godly wisdom is enlightening. During this session, another church experience came to my mind, one that has caused me emotional pain. I considered it as well, and its residual impact on my ability and/or inability to function well in my church family. This, too,  gave me new insights and clarity of thought. Positive benefits came from this spiritual exercise of introspective and constructive learning infused with the Holy Spirit’s directing.

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