The first time I used a computer was around 1993, rather late in the game. I was half scared to use it. I took a class at the local community college, an introduction to computers’ class. During the same time frame, my cousin’s husband gave me a used Macintosh computer, one of those tiny units with a small screen (that later ended up being doorstops). He added ClarisWorks on it and I was good to go. He also added on Tetris and a couple of other simple games, like a helicopter that dropped water bombs or something like that, that the kids loved. It’s what I learned on and wrote many documents on once I learned how to operate it. It had a printer that would take paper with holes on both sides where they were connected together flat in a box,  the sheets were perforated to tear them apart. You may remember using that kind of printer. It was very common in those days. It was a great tool to learn on. I grew very fond of ClarisWorks. It was easy to use.

At first, I didn’t know what I was doing. At all!

We had computer lab time at the college. Come when you will during certain hours. The lab was always jam-packed students, my time was limited (four kids at home). I sat at a computer. Stumped. I didn’t know how to direct the cursor, or move between A, B, and C drives. I didn’t even know how to “boot” up the computer or even what that term meant. I didn’t know how to show “invisibles” and “formulas” both required for the class assignments. A man in his early thirties noticed my confusion, I think I asked him one or two questions. He started to help me. He was kind …. and patient. He sort of chuckled at my hesitation and lack of understanding. I was afraid to touch anything on the keyboard for fear of going to the wrong place. I remember in class, when the instructor talked about fonts, I didn’t know what a font was, but wisely, kept that to myself. From that point on, the young man would always help me out, we’d arrange what time I was going to be at the lab, and then he would meet me there. He was a veteran taking classes. I don’t know how I’d have made it without his assistance. I was always too quiet for my own good.

When I put in the word “help” in the search bar this morning, I actually was thinking about people who need spiritual or emotional help, who need help because they’re desperate, discouraged, suicidal, or closing in on despair. People need help. I need help. You need help. We’re not invincible. We need to make ourselves available to one another. Sometimes, just a word or a smile can improve the day, give hope for your life to turn around. There have been a couple of experiences in my life when a few words said to me in kindness met my inner need, helping me not feel so alone or sad. We need to be valued and appreciated. All of us do. We need approval and validation, love and care.

If you need some help, feel discouraged, are alone, there are people like me who want to tell you that you matter, that you’re not any trouble, that there is always another day, a brighter future. Some of us have lived the words that we say. We are proof that there are better days ahead. Morning has broken. There is always hope. You matter. Help? There is help available. You may have to look for it, do the hard work, but someone or some program will help you out, just like that young man took it upon himself to help me out.

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